Etiquette Tuesday – The Invasion
Being a pastor’s daughter and later, a pastor’s wife, led me to adjust with different people and places. Of all the nine (9) different cities I’ve lived in, only two (2) of them put me off guard and the reasons were not the places or people, but because of me, of all the insecurities I was experiencing at the time. Usually, I love changes, love moving, meeting new people, working in new places, familiarizing myself to new cultures, and taking on new challenges. There’s just one thing that makes it quite uncomfortable though… the fact that I have to find a new family doctor, a dentist, and a hair salon.
I have to tell my entire life story all over again. Yes, I’m a pastor’s wife. Yes, I got married at 17. Yes, I chose to adopt a child. Yes, my hair is thicker than it looks.
For some reason, people in general find it necessary to ask you everything about your life, as if they had the right to know all the details. It’s one thing when you want to share it, like I do in the blog many, many times, and another entirely different matter when people consistently ask you… they’re invading your privacy.
And even if you just give them a one-word answer, they keep pushing for more… talk about being in an unpleasant conversation!
Here’s what I normally have to put up with:
‘Do you have children? How old is he? WOW… you’re so young to have a child that old!’
And then they look at me as if I had my son while I was still a single teenager, so I have to explain that I was married 20 years ago, and hope they can do the math.
If it weren’t so rude, I’d just say:
‘Please mind your own business, I’m just here for the haircut – thank you!’
Privacy invasion is unpleasant – be smart and be content with whatever private information the person is willing to give you for free. After all, do you give your home keys to every stranger you meet? Why should you then give your own history?
Author of the books "Better than a new pair of shoes", "V woman" and "Casamento Blindado" (Bulletproof Marriage). Founder of "Godllywood" and "Rahab Project". Presenter of "The Love School" at Rede Record.